Saturday, September 30, 2023

Talking turkey with Argyle’s famous gobbler

Tom/George, The Argyle Turkey

If you travel on Hwy 377 near Frenchtown Road, you have most likely spotted the famous Argyle Turkey, also known as Tom or George.

He is always hanging around the busy highway running “afowl” of the police, or harassing customers at Argyle Auto Care. His notoriety has even spawned a Facebook page: “Tom George The Argyle Turkey.”

As we approach his least-favorite holiday, we caught up with Tom/George and asked him a few questions.

I don’t mean to ruffle your feathers, but why do you have two names?

I don’t have two names. But not everyone can agree on one name, so I put the right name next to the not-right name and everyone gets along. And they say turkeys are stupid.

Why do you hang out in the middle of the road?

To prove that I’m not chicken. Seriously, everyone should experience the feeling of belonging you get when cars surround you and people call “We love you turkey! Thanks for slowing us down! You’ve taught us a great lesson!” When I need a little reminder that you all need me, hanging out in the middle of a busy intersection does the trick.

Where do you roost?

I stay where I like, but not one place for very long as is the nature of mid-food-chainers like me.

What is the big attraction with Jeeps?

One day, I heard someone say that I hated Jeeps. This was news to me so I examined every Jeep that drove by for a few days. Then I decided, you know what? I do hate Jeeps. Why are they always waving at each other and seem to be always in a state of restoration? Plastic windows? No doors? Big knobby tires on the paved highway??? Have tried to run them off ever since.

How do you manage to survive all those Thanksgivings?

For Thanksgiving, I encourage eating outside the box…enchiladas, ribs, a nice chili with cornbread. We really don’t taste that good, and when we do, it’s off to dreamland with you. Additionally, I’m a wild animal protected by state law and loving fans who take down license plate numbers and descriptions of people who even look at me wrong.

Tom/George, The Argyle Turkey

Do you have a girlfriend?

Why, are you available? You better watch your flirting because there are seven guinea hens ready to defend their claim on me.

What are your favorite hobbies?

I like long walks down the road with my guinea hens and enjoy monitoring the speeds of electric scooters to Ferraris. Trains don’t do anything for me, though.

Can you fly?

Sort of. I just wing it.

What is your favorite meal?

Live grasshoppers and fresh acorns with a little gravel sprinkled on top

What’s your favorite drink?

Wild Turkey (duh…)

Thanks for “talking turkey” with us!

Thank you for stopping by. It’s not often I see people outside their cars. You are very brave.

CTG Staff
CTG Staff
The Cross Timbers Gazette News Department

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