The Soapbox: Resolution Smesolution

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Brandi Chambless

Hello my name is Brandi and I am an addict. That’s right. My obsession is not the usual “fall off the bandwagon” February splurge.

It’s cauliflower.

Weird. I know, right?

But, you see, cauliflower is only the carrier for the real gold.

Brookshire’s Private Label Southwestern Dip.

Since 1928, the Tyler, Texas based grocery store has been growing into the empire it is today. It currently operates under the brands of Super 1 Foods, Spring Market, and Brookshire’s.  Their Grade A Sour Cream Southwestern Dip is my vice, and around my home or office it’s not even a secret.

So, one particular day, I find cauliflower in the community fridge at the office.  Oh yes!  As with most businesses, we have certain kitchen etiquette that keeps friendships in tact.

For instance, we do not have a dishwasher, so wash your own cup.  I thought about creating a #WYOC hashtag to help the matter, but no one caught on.

If a snack is left out on the round table it is considered community property for anyone who is hungry.

The community fridge is where things get a little down and dirty. To protect my goods, I publicly double dip to ensure no one gets into my homemade chicken salad.

Even though there is a rule about eating someone else’s lunch, I’m sure some people might “accidentally” forget.

So then, there was this one particular day and it appeared that cauliflower was residing in the community fridge.

“It’s fair game,” said the office manager. This one particular day had just turned into my lucky day.  There was enough cauliflower for a full week at lunch.

One problem…I was out of my Southwestern Addiction.

After leaving the office, I ran to four grocery stores ISO my precious prize, but to no avail, until at last I found a clerk to help me.

After a few minutes, the clerk emerged with the good news and the bad news.

The good news: He found four cartons of the elusive dip.

The bad news:  The dip was discontinued.

The good news:  The dip was 75 cents a carton.

The bad news:  The dip expires in three weeks’ time.

“I’ll take them all,” I said.

I couldn’t wait to get back to the office and crack into the cauliflower.

The bad news:  The community cauliflower had been divvied and devoured by my colleagues while I was on my mission to find the dip.

The other good news:  I had four containers of Southwestern Dip for a total cost of $3.00 plus tax.

Just about that time, someone dropped off a lemon meringue pie on the community table in the break room.  Yea baby.  Lemon meringue pie for lunch.

I’ve Tweeted @Brookshires. We’ve talked on the phone. We’ve exchanged emails.

They have sent me a photo of what they feel is an adequate substitute for their private label and even promised me a complimentary one. Marzetti Southwest Ranch Veggie Dip. I am not so sure about this.

In spite of being weeks into the New Year and hooked on something as healthy as cauliflower & dip, I was involuntarily forced to eat lemon meringue pie. I am not sure if this really counts as falling off the bandwagon since it was through no fault of my own.

Nevertheless, I figured sometimes it’s best to just go with the flow. When Life gives you lemon meringue pie…you just eat it. And, if in the process you happen to break your New Year’s resolution, you can count yourself as a perfectly normal human being who just remembered what it means to enjoy life!  So, until Valentine’s Day chocolates roll around, here’s to the ordinary days in February!

Read Brandi’s column each month in The Cross Timbers Gazette.

About The Author

Brandi Chambless

Read Brandi's column each month in The Cross Timbers Gazette newspaper.

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